Christmas letter 2008

Hey all!

We thought we'd send our Christmas letter fashionably late this year so as to make a noticeable statement -- it wasn't that we were disorganized and behind schedule at all.

Our biggest most recent news took place in 2007. On December 6th we welcomed Cara Noelle into our home. She arrived six weeks early and weighed 5 pounds 4 ounces. Thankfully she was healthy as a horse. She's a happy little girl and I'm loving having another female in the house. She just turned one and among her first words are "Dora" and "backpack", and no I never let my children watch TV.

Eli, our child with the angelic face and demonic soul -- just kidding -- his face really isn't all that angelic (ha ha), is enjoying his first year of preschool. Tuesdays and Thursdays he attends a local program and another two days each week he and I participate in a co-op preschool. I get to teach him every fourth week and it's fun for both of us. And yes in case you were wondering, I keep him busy four mornings a week because I NEED a break from my precious munchkin.

Joel's becoming quite the little swimmer. Always afraid of completely submerging his head under water, he overcame his fear this past summer and is now happily paddling away as often as he can get to a pool. His current game show obsession is The Price is Right and he asked Santa Claus for the Wii version of aforementioned show. After finding and opening his new game he was immediately off to play it, his other presents no where near as paramount.

Kelly's busy working, working and working some more at Northrop Grumman. Still, in spite of his super busy schedule he still makes time to be a great husband and father. Cara has been our worst sleeper and it's usually Kelly that gets up to quiet her during her middle of the night crying jags. Thank you honey, you're the best!

I'm of course doing the mommy thing and I love my little rugrats in spite of their temper tantrums, potty accidents and bouts of the flu. They wear me out, but the sweet things they say and do make everything worth it.

Last summer, Joel picked a rose from the backyard, brought it over to me and said, "Mom, you're nice, you're beautiful and you're fantastic!"

I mean in what other job would I get such precious and loving feedback? Quite the perk!

Here's hoping that you and your family are happy and doing well.

Warmest wishes!

Kelly, Amy, Joel, Eli and Cara Ethington

Pictionary, potty training Eli and cute Cara

I played Pictionary with Joel today. I love playing with him because I love seeing his drawings and his interpretations. Also if he doesn't know what something is, it's a good learning opportunity. Today he drew THE BEST ambulance complete with siren and cross. I was so proud of him.

I love the confidence he exudes when we play. "Mom I'm really good at this game because I'm such a good drawer." I so want that confidence to stay in his little soul and it warms my mommy heart to hear it.

He's also very into The Price is Right now. Kelly tapes it everyday and they watch it daily after dinner. When Joel's home he's yanking me around to play another Price is Right game. I love seeing his creativity when he incorporates the various pricing games to make them his own

He's continuing to have trouble at school keeping his hands to himself. I kind of blame the soccer camp I put him in last summer where he learned lots of bad habits. He does better when we've promised him a reward if he has so many good days total. So far he's gone to a haunted house, seen High School Musical 3 and is working on a trip to a water slide park with Daddy.

Eli is still such an adorable looking little person. A month or so ago I was teaching grace arts at Joel's school. Eli was at preschool at Emily Walsh's house and Katie Robertson was watching Cara. As soon as preschool ended Emily brought Eli over to Katie's house where Cara was. Katie's little boys kept telling Eli to look at the baby girl they were watching. When I picked Eli and Cara up and we were riding home in the car Eli asked me where Cara was. I told him she was right next to him in her car seat. "NO!" he shouted, "That's baby girl!"

Eli's potty trained, but he doesn't like to do anything on his own. He ALWAYS wants me to be a part of his potty experience and he won't poop in the toliet, but luckily he doesn't do it in his underwear either. He usally has a bowel movement after he goes to bed when he has his nighttime diaper on and Kelly almost always changes it. What a nice husband!

Cara's developing more and more into her own little person. She can stand quite well on her own right now and is mimicing us more and more. When I nurse her or feed her a bottle, she just squeezes her fist and signs "milk" over and over again. It's so cute!

She's definitely my worst sleeper though, she's still not sleeping through the night.

First Grade Frustrations

Joel has been having a hard time in first grade. It breaks my little mother's heart. He started out spitting (doing raspberries) at other kids and blowing in their faces. None of which the kids liked. He does this kind of thing when he wrestles around with his dad and they're both laughing and having a good time. So I think he was just trying to have fun.

I hadn't heard from the teachers for awhile and was hoping no gnews was good gnews. No such luck. Apparently now Joel is still blowing, but instead of spitting, he's pinching. Last Thursday he left a bruise on some kid's arm.

Riding the regular ed bus has really been a trial for him. He's been engaging in the aforementioned behaviors there too and the only supervision there is an already frazzled bus driver who has no clue about his autistic issues (I mean she's been told he's on the autism spectrum, but what does that really mean to her?) She doesn't get it.

So I've been driving him in the mornings even tho it has been a pain with getting Eli off to preschool, and the time involved in making sure he pees before he goes. Joel's always a little late. I wanted to make sure I took him in the mornings to give him a better chance at starting the day off on the right foot.

All last week he came home off the bus from school in a sad/mad/bad mood. I feel like my sweet little boy is turning into a sad little boy who is turning into a sullen, even more inward little boy, and I DON'T LIKE IT. So, needless to say I am now going to pick him up from school too.

I would love to be able to spend more time at the school, but it's tough with Eli and Cara. I am going to teach Grace Arts and hopefully do some other volunteering maybe with reading with the kids.

Kelly is going into lunch with Joel every Friday which Joel loves.

On a happier note, today in Primary Joel's teacher divided his four person (today) class into two groups. He put Brian and Alex together and Zachary and Joel. Joel immediately walked up to Zachary, put his arm around him and said, "I guess it's you and me Zachary!" How cute. When Kelly told me about it in the car on the way home, Joel got his adorable little "mommy and daddy are talking about me and they're proud" smile on and I loved it.

Cara looked like quite the little princess today at church. She wore her green taffeta dress that Grandma Hurst gave her that had a sweet little matching headband and ever so adorable white patent leather shoes that I got off of freecycle.

Joel and Eli were twinners in their orange, blue and white striped shirts that I got on sale at Gymboree. I'm not sure if Joel noticed because he hates it when I dress him and Eli alike and he didn't protest, I mean no more than he normally does when he has to get ready for church.

Well I'm off to make Joel a reward chart for not spitting, blowing or pinching other kids at school. Hopefully it will help.

Cute Kids

Eli made me laugh yesterday. He was poking at my eyes (probably because Cara had earlier been poking at my eyes). And I told him, "Be careful, Mommy's eyes are delicate."

Then Eli says, "No I think fragile."

I couldn't believe his little vocabulary.

Joel likes to tell jokes lately. Today when we were out at the playset he told me the oldie but goodie about the frog in the blender. Then he upped the mileage and his new answer was "a giraffe in a blender" and he laughed and laughed. It made me feel warm and fuzzy that he changed the scenario around in a completely logical way (so to speak).

Eli has to be the center of attention. ALWAYS. Sometimes lately if Cara starts crying he'll shout, "NO Cara, it's my turn to cry!" followed by loud wails. I'm a little fearful of what the teenage years will bring. . . One day at a time. One day at a time.

Cara is crawling and pulling up and putting everything in her mouth and cute as cute can be. She's such a smiley girl. I love to kiss those chubba wubba cheeks and her bright blue eyes just light up every time I enter the room. Hopefully she'll be the child who inherits Kelly's warm and loving personality . . .

Still working on the potty training with Eli. I don't know if he'll ever do it independently since he always wants Mommy there. He doesn't like peeing in unfamiliar toliets in bathrooms where there is no Elmo potty seat -- even tho he rarely uses said Elmo potty seat any more. I guess I need to lug the thing with me every where I take him to exorcise all of the potty demons that lurk in other bathrooms.

I've just gone thru some of my Grandma's papers. She died less than a month ago at 90 years old. Reading her memories and stories made me wish that I'd asked her more questions about her childhood.

She was the second of six children. Two of whom died in childhood. Her oldest brother Lamont (Monty) drowned at age 8 in the river while attending a birthday party. Her younger sister Beatrice (Beebe) died at age 6 of diptheria. Her brother Ben lived to adulthood, but died in his twenties of Alport Syndrome (the hereditary family kidney disease) leaving behind a young wife and six children. Grandma's poor parents, I can't imagine having to cope with the death of three of my children well before their time.

Grandma never talked much about her brother RL, the black sheep of the family. He had spent time in jail for writing bad checks and in Grandma's time you didn't talk about family ne'er do wells. I read an account of hers that talked about how RL was slow to speak clearly and that the teacher of the one room school house refused to work with him. When he did go to school, she would just give him paper and a crayon and tell him to draw a picture. Not surprisingly he often skipped school. It made me sad to think that the little boy was refused an education just because of a speech impediment. He died in 1992 or '93, I wish I'd been able to know him.

My grandma was a scrappy little girl. If she lived today she would have been a much more rebellious teenager than any of her daughters or granddaughters. She was out to have a good time. She loved high school and had a lot of friends.

Laurie is staying with us this summer. It's nice to have her here as I think her presence and help with kids/dishes is probably helping to make this summer more bearable for me as well as preserve my sanity. Other times I just can't wait for her to move out. Sometimes even a helpful family member can be an unwanted guest.

We joined a pool this summer and haven't gone as often as I thought we would, but a couple of weeks ago for the first time, Joel put his whole head under the water -- a very scary thing for him. I was so proud of him and loved seeing in his shining eyes that he was so proud of himself. He's my sweetheart.

Eli is a terror. The most adorable terror ever, but a terror nonetheless. He's very demanding and wants my attention ALL OF THE TIME. If I'm cuddling Cara, he has to cuddle with me too. If I'm trying to work with Joel, he has to be included. He's very sensitive and short tempered.

I think Kelly's dad and Melissa thought he was a brat when they visited earlier this year for Cara's blessing. They commented on his "interesting" personality. Of course I've loved watching him grow up. He's done so many "normal" things that Joel never did. Lately he's been pretend playing with pretend, meaning non-existent, objects. I know that is a step in typical child development, so I love watching him cuddle his pretend blue puppy or pretend his pretend blue car is zooming around a pretend road.

For some reason, the pretend objects he assigns to himself are always blue, the ones he assigns to Joel are always red and mine are always yellow. I think it's because when we play Pop up Pirate those colors are usually the color of swords we each normally use.

Cara is adorable, she seems more aware and more interested in her environment than either of her brothers and definitely more connected to me than either of them. She loves to watch her brothers play and Eli, who interacts with her A LOT MORE than Joel, can really get her laughing. I think she is going to keep her blue eyes and I hope she keeps her pinky complexion like her daddy's and doesn't get my sallow one.

It's been nice having the playset in the backyard. A week or so ago Kelly put up the teeter totter swing and Joel and Eli love to get on it and swing together and I thoroughly enjoy watching them doing it. Anything that Joel will willingly and happily do with Eli is so precious to me. Even though they are very different I hope and pray that they will be close and support each other's endeavors throughout their lives, and have each other to lean on.

I noticed in my BYU alumni magazine that Stephen Harvey Fletcher died, he was the patriarch who gave me my blessing. I loved him instantaneously-- he just radiated warmth and love. His obituary in The Daily Herald said he was known for his warm and generous personality and though I only spent a half hour with him in an empty room in the Jesse Knight Humanities building, I can attest to his wonderful nature.

I am so anxious for school to start. Eli is staring preschool too. I need some down time from kids to get my house semi decent clean and have some more time for myself. Joel had a wonderful kindergarten year and I hope he has another wonderful experience in first grade. Eli is supposed to be potty trained for preschool and he basically is, but he's not good about going to the bathroom on his own, without being prompted by us. He also thinks he has to take off everything below the waist in order to use the toilet. I know a preschool teacher won't be wanting to redress him all the time. My biggest fear is that they'll send him home saying he's not ready for preschool yet. I need that child to be ready for preschool and I think he will absolutely love it. Only time will tell.

. Cpl. Stephen Daniel wrote this letter to his parents during the Vietnam War:

August 9, 1968

Mom and Dad:
Last night one more Marine died. No one will ever hear or care about it except his parents and us. There is no nation to mourn for him or fly our flag at half mast. Yet this Marine did more for his country than any President or Senator ever did. His name was Corporal Lee Clark.

He was a good marine and a better person. He didn't deserve dying in a country not worth fightin' for. But he is dead and those back home whose freedom he was defending will never know his name.

Cpl. Lee Clark is dead but those who knew him and fought with him will never forget him. He had about 38 days left in the Marine Corps and in Viet Nam. 38 days to start living again, to see the world, and home, 38 days left and he is dead.

It makes you wonder.

The dictionary defines freedom as: The state of being free, of not being imprisoned or enslaved. A synonym is liberty. An antonym is bondage.

A week or so ago I was getting my haircut by a woman from Viet Nam. She was happy to tell me that in the upcoming week her brother and his family were finally moving from Viet Nam to the United States. They had waited for eight long years for both countries to finish the paperwork and give them the a ok to come. “I love the United States,” she told me, “because if you are patient and willing to work hard, you can achieve anything you want.”

I know I have always taken my freedom for granted. For me the Fourth of July has mostly been about summer fun and fireworks. Memorial Day, a herald for going to the beach and the ice cream man. Veteran’s Day? Merely a two word notation on the calendar. After all it can’t be an important holiday if you don’t even get out of school for it.

Moroni was talking to people like me when he wrote in Alma chapter 60 about those who sit on their thrones in a state of thoughtless stupor oblivious to the soldiers fighting and dying for freedom. Our liberty is easily taken for granted in the hustle and bustle and to do lists of everyday life.

During the American Revolution, Albigence Waldo of the
First Connecticut Infantry Regiment wrote to his family,

“December 14, 1777

People who live at home in Luxury and Ease, quietly possessing their habitation, Enjoying their Families in peace, have but a very faint idea of the continual Anxiety the man endures who is in a Camp.

What Sweet Felicities have I left at home; A charming Wife -- pretty Children -- Good Beds--good food -- good Cookery -- all agreeable -- all harmonious. Here, all Confusion -- smoke and Cold -- hunger and filthyness -- A pox on my bad luck.”

Undeniably the freedom we enjoy in the United States of America came at an enormous cost.

Harry Bott from Provo, Utah received the following letter from his father while serving during World War 1.

“Dear Son,

You have a fine little Baby Girl, she is 5 days old today and is doing well and she will be waiting for you when you return, but your dear wife has passed to the other side today. Dear Boy it is sad news - but remember God's Will not ours to be done. Now be brave and remember the Baby will want your care and attention when you come back again.

May God give you strength to bear your burden is my prayer for you.

from your Father.

Bott's father wrote to tell him the sad news: his wife had perished in the influenza epidemic of 1918-1919 soon after delivering a daughter. Bott would not see his baby girl or visit his wife's grave for another year.

Harry Bott’s sacrifice was surely part of Joseph’s vision that we can read about in 2 Nephi chapter 3 verse 5.
5 Wherefore, Joseph truly asaw our day. And he obtained a bpromise of the Lord, that out of the fruit of his loins the Lord God would raise up a crighteous dbranch unto the house of Israel; not the Messiah, but a branch which was to be broken off, nevertheless, to be remembered in the covenants of the Lord that the Messiah should be made emanifest unto them in the latter days, in the spirit of power, unto the bringing of them out of fdarkness unto light—yea, out of hidden darkness and out of captivity unto freedom.
Mr. Bott sacrificed for the self-determination we often take for granted today. Let us not forget him.
Warrant Officer, Frank J. Conwell wrote the following to his aunt and uncle during WWII:

February 6th 1945

Hello John, Ann and all the Little Ones:
The weather has been very cold over here with plenty of snow, snow, and more snow. As I look at the kids sledding, throwing snow balls, it brings back many memories of the good times I had when I was a kid. All us lads took out our Flexible Flyers and went belly whopping down the hills. We made snow men with it and packed it into hard, round balls that caught other kids in the head and melted down the backs of their necks. When our feet got cold we would call it a day. When we were kids snow sure was fun.

There's a lot of snow on the Western Front these days and the country looks like a Christmas card. It's beautiful.

But the Flexible Flyers have turned into tanks. The snowballs are grenades. The wet stuff trickling down the back of necks is often blood. And when you're numb with cold there's no place to go to. Nothing to look forward to. Nothing but snow. Cold, wet, beautiful snow.

Hoping this letter finds you all in the best of health.

Sincerely,
Frank
I wouldn’t be surprised if Frank had prayed as Moroni did in Alma chapter 46 verse 16.
16 And therefore, at this time, Moroni prayed that the cause of the Christians, and the afreedom of the land might be favored.
We now know that the western front was liberated from the Nazis and that Frank’s suffering was not in vain. Moroni’s prayers were also answered. We enjoy the freedom he sought for today. I’m grateful to Frank and Moroni and to all those who fought with them for their courage and bravery.

P. Burns wrote the following letter to Ann Maceubbin during the Civil War:

Nashville, June 10, 1861

Ann,
It makes my heart sick to think of the state of our once happy and yet beloved country . . . to see two brave armies armed with all the deadly instruments that art and wealth could procure and to think that when they meet in the bloody battlefields what destruction and misery they can produce.

What is most horrid of all in this contest is that brother will meet brother and father will meet son in the strife.

No matter what side I might take, might bring me in contact with a cousin or uncle, & god forbid that I should ever be found in arms against either.

Ann, I will be in your town by the 27th, but should I not be prompt do not despair for these are squirrelly times.

Your friend, P. Burns

Mr. Burns seems to have longed for earlier times of tranquility when brother had not taken arms against brother or father against son. Moroni felt the same longing for past times of peace when he constructed the title of liberty.

Alma 46: 12
12 And it came to pass that he rent his coat; and he took a piece thereof, and wrote upon it—aIn memory of our God, our religion, and freedom, and our peace, our wives, and our children—and he fastened it upon the end of a pole.
When we look at our flag I hope we remember those same valiant ideals.


1st Lt. Dean Allen wrote this letter to his wife, Joyce during the Vietnam War:

Dearest Wife,
I am out on ambush with eleven men and a medic -- after everything is set up in position I have nothing to do but think about why I am here. Why do I have to be the one to tell someone to do something that may get him blown away?

Being a good platoon leader is a lonely job. I don't want to really get to know anybody over here because it would be bad enough to lose a man -- I darn sure don't want to lose a friend. But as hard as I try not to get involved with my men I still can't help liking them, and getting close to a few. They come up and say "hey do you want to see picture of my wife or girl?"

Like I said it gets lonely trying to stay separate.

Maybe sometime I'll try to tell you how scared I am now. There is nothing I can do about it, but wait for another day to start + finish.

All my love always,
Dean

Four days later, Dean Allen stepped on a land mine and was killed

It seems Dean Allen like Moroni was a man that did not delight in bloodshed. A man who understood the price of freedom and paid with his life.


Pfc. Ernest Uno wrote the following letter to his sister Mae during WWII:

Livorno, Italy
Japanese American 442nd Regiment

Dearest Mae,
I've got a bunch of letters in my pocket that are dirty and falling apart. They keep me going until new ones come.

Being part of front line troops, we are usually the first to march thru the towns which have cost so much blood and sweat to liberate. But the people are grateful. They know that when we come, the war is over for them. As soon as we enter, we are showered with all they have to spare. What they have to give is simple but when you're tired and worn out from fighting you accept their gifts with a lump in your throat.

I know now, for certain, what we are fighting for! Our mission is to free all the nations of oppression. Give the children of this and the coming generations a chance to learn the true meaning of Freedom.

Please give my regards to the Morimotos, lots of love.

Ernest

Because of men like Ernest Uno we have freedom. The freedom to worship our God as we see fit. The freedom to meet every Sunday as a congregation and feel the Spirit of the Lord. The freedom to choose good over evil and to remember the words that Pahoran wrote to Moroni so long ago:

Alma 61:14
14 Therefore, my beloved brother, Moroni, let us resist evil, . . . that we may retain our freedom, that we may rejoice in the great privilege of our church, and in the cause of our Redeemer and our God.



.

you're nice you're beautiful and you're fantastic

Joel's been pretty cute lately. The other day when we were out in the backyard he picked a couple of roses off the bush and handed ttem to me with a hug and a kiss and said, "mom, these are for you because you're nice, you're beautiful and you're fantastic!"
He makes me smile.



He gave a talk in church today. He always moans and groans when we tell him he has a talk or something, but when he gets up to the microphone he is in his element. His talk was on preparing to go to the temple someday. He read in the talk that we have to get baptized before we go to the temple. Then he talked looked at the audience and asked those in the audience who had been baptized to raise their hands. At every new paragraph he would pause and ask the members of the audience to raise their hands if they wanted to hear the next paragraph.



We watched fireworks last night that culminated the last night of the Herndon Festival. We let the kids stay up to watch them too and Eli LOVED it. I described a big firework as "ginormous" and whenever another big firework appeared he would say, "look mommy nother ginormous one." If there was a small firework he would say, "look mommy a baby one!" He was so excited about it, it was precious.



Cara wore a cute light blue linen cotton dress today with embroidered paster flowers on the front. It had a peter pan collar and short puff sleeves. She also wore white tights and patent leather black shoes that have shiny black ribbon bowes and a white headband. She looked SO CUTE. I love dressing her up. Girl clothes are just so much cuter than boy clothes. Sorry guys. Unfortunately lately and especially this afternoon/evening/night she has really been teeting. It seems to bother her a lot more than it botheredd Joel and Eli, or maybe I am just forgetting. I feel so bad I can't do more to ease her pain.



Kelly's still working on our playset in the backyard. We've got the slide workable and the boys are loving it. It feels so right to have your little boys playing gleefully in the backyard. I'll be SO GLAD when it is completely finished. It has been such an ORDEAL-- between the deck tear down, digging out the deep cemented in posts, getting rid of plants, leveling the yard, buying supplies here, there and everywhere, building the new structure not to mention the vile, disgusting, totally beyond gross problem of the RATS that we discovered