Evil Times and Cornfused

Driving home from the corn maze today I happened to notice a home along the road that looked like a castle. I pointed it out to the kids and said, "Wouldn't you like to live in a castle?" "Yes!" squealed Cara. "No!" proclaimed Eli. "Yes you would Eli," continued Cara, "Then you would get to meet the king!" "Cara," said Eli in his all knowing voice, "Castles don't have kings any more, only in Evil times." "No," chimed Cara, "Castles have kings in Evil times and nice times."

The corn maze kicked us in the butt. We could not find our way outta the thing. Never-Say-Die-Kelly wanted to continue until we conquered it, but the kids were hot and whiny and eventually I convinced Kelly to wave our flag and surrender for assistance so we could be led out of the F.S.I. (Farm Scene Investigation). We were definitely mazed and cornfused.

We also went on a hay ride and the kids played on the many play structures and tried their hands at the games.

Very tired and thirsty by the time we left, we bought a gallon of the local apple juice and a bag of kettle corn and headed home.

Decided to go to the maze this year instead of Cox Farms because Joel broke his arm last Sunday (long story) and he wouldn't have been able to participate in the rope swing and other attractions at Cox Farms. Corn maze was also cheaper -- bonus!

Dear Amy

Dear Amy,
I demand no apointment.
I demand no summer school and no day camp.
I want to ask you:
Have you ever wondered when something is fun be comes a lot less fun
when you do it?
It happened to me.
I desreve to stay home than(then) go to the beach this summer.
Your bored friend,
JOEL ETHINGTON


Joel sent me the above email a week or so ago. He had heard what I had planned for him for the summer and he was not into it. He told me, "It feels too much like school." He even got really freaked out about going to Soaring Over Seven camp (which he loves) in July. While last February he kept asking me, "Mom, have you signed me up for Soaring Over Seven yet?"

The fact is I have to try to keep Joel pretty busy during the summer. If I don't he just melds into the computer 24/7. And once computer meld has set in getting Joel to do anything else becomes next to impossible. There is much weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth, and if he starts school in said state, wo unto the teacher who has to work with him.

However luckily everything has gone pretty well so far. We started speech therapy again recently because we have some FSA money that we need to use ASAP. On the first appointment the SLP tested Joel's vocabulary. He didn't slip up until the 17/18 year old section. What the what? The speech therapist was surprised and so was I. I had no idea the depth of his vocabulary. It's very difficult to have any kind of conversation with Joel, so I don't really know what all's up in his head. The SLP asked me where his vocab came from. ??????????????????? Don't ask me, I have no clue. When I told Joel he had tested into the 17 to 18 year old range, he got that twinkle in his eye that means, "Damn, I'm good." He damn sure is.

Eli was looking out the window watching the lightening bugs the other night when he turns to me and says, "Mommy the world's turned into glitter." He can be so sweet at times . . . (sigh) . . .

Cara's our little princess and she knows it. She went to a birthday party last Saturday and insisted on bringing all the stuff from her goody bag to church on Sunday. She entered the chapel in full regalia: two crowns, two necklaces as well as multiple bracelets and rings. She wanted to show off all da bling she got.

Tipsy Joel?

We actually had Family Home Evening last Monday and had a lesson about the Word of Wisdom. Of course we discussed the things that are appropriate and healthy for our bodies and the things that are not. We told the kids that one of the reasons we don't drink alcohol is because it effects the clarity of our minds. Eli chose Love One Another as our closing song and Joel chose to sing his own Joel gibberish version of it which gave him the giggles. When we finished the song I said, "Hmmm, someone was singing a very interesting version of Love One Another" to which Eli replied, "I think Joel's been drinking the wine."

Cracked Kelly and me up! And of course Eli wasn't even trying to be funny which makes it even funnier.

But Grandpa Was

Yesterday Eli and I were looking through my wedding pictures. It was fun to show him pictures of my grandparents and other relatives and friends who attended. I got to a picture of my parents, Kelly and me and asked him who was in the picture. "Mommy, Daddy, Grandma and Grandpa." My mom still had dark hair and Eli said, "When you got married Grandma wasn't old yet." Then he paused, looked at my dad and said, "But Grandpa was."

Cracked me up.

Not too long ago I was ruffling through Joel's hair and said, "Boy we need to get you a haircut!"

"Yeah," Joel responded. "I don't want to turn into Rapunzel!"

Made me laugh. His comment was probably inspired by the movie Twisted, a current movie based on the long locked lady's famous story.

He still needs that haircut.

The Dau of Eli

TODAY

Eli: "Mommy what if there was a boy and he needed to go potty, and he pointed his penis straight up and the pee pee went in his mouth?" (said with manic giddiness, wonder and awe for his own supposition)

Me: "That would be disgusting."

Eli: "Yeah cuz nobody likes to drink their own pee, not even Jesus."

Yeah.

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Eli: "Mommy, how old is Christopher Columbus?"

Me: "He's dead, but he lived about five or six hundred years ago."

Eli: "Yeah, but how OLD is he?"

Me: "He's dead . . . yada yada yada"

Eli: "Oh, you don't have birthdays in heaven?"

Me: "No."

Eli: "Oh, oh cuz you can't eat in heaven and on your birthday you have to eat cake or cupcakes, so you can't have birthdays in heaven."

Yeah.

I See the Connection!

Yesterday we went out to my parents' house. They had come back from Albany for the weekend to transfer some furniture here. Andrew came with them. He flew out a few weeks ago from Phoenix to look for work. He couldn't find any kind of job in Phoenix and he was willing to do about anything. I guess the recession has really hit hard there.

We hadn't seen Andrew for three years and he's never met Cara. While we were outside playing on the playset Joel looked from Andrew to me and back again and said, "Yeah I can see the connection." I love it that he was thinking about Andrew and I being siblings and looking for similarities.

Eli was very excited to go and see the pumpkin patch that he had helped Grandpa plant. My parents had already brought us several pumpkins where they had scratched our names into while they were growing. We loaded up several more and now we have our own little pumpkin patch in the front yard.

One of my goals at the beginning of the school year was to revamp our filing system. I finally did it last week. While doing so I came across all of Joel's preschool evaluations and day to day notes from his preschool teachers and the people who worked with him from Early Intervention. It made me realize that I truly have had a village helping me to raise my Joel and I felt really grateful for all of the people who have helped, and loved and cared about Joel.

It was a trip down memory lane to read about his milestones and behaviors and how far we have come. One tender memory was when he was learning sign language. He learned how to sign the word hurt and would use it appropriately when he got an "owie". He would also use it when a toy or other beloved object got taken away from him. I thought it was really sweet that he immediately applied the word to not only physical pain but also when his feelings were ingured.

Reading about Joel helped to stimulate some memories about Eli's babyhood as well. When he was about 10 months old he would sign the word milk by pumping and squeezing his little fist when he wanted to nurse. But he would also make the same sign when he just wanted loves and cuddles from Mommy. Obviously he felt such comfort and security when he was nursing that he associated with work milk with Mommy snuggles. Sweet memories . . .

Things the Kids Say

Joel and I were watching Project Runway and Joel was doing his usual scene by scene commentary, i.e. "I love the pink and the brown together, looks fabulous. That is so sexy." (He has no idea what he is really saying). Anyway the designers were surprised and annoyed about who was chosen winner and one of them said, "How could he win? What bleeping show is this anyway?" Joel responds, "Project Runway you idiot!" That made me laugh. He's so literal and can't imagine that one of the designers is so ignorant of the show she's starring in.

My mom was in the car with Kelly and the kids a little while back and Cara was singing. "Cara you have really good pitch for such a little girl," my mom commented. Enraged, Cara screamed back, "I NOT A LITTLE GIRL, I BIG!" Geez some people just don't know how to accept a compliment.

Cara was eating something the other day and says, "Umm, mommy this is really nummy!" Wanting to gobble on her little cheeks I responded, "You know who else is really nummy?" Before I even finished the sentence she shrieked, "NO! I not dessert!"

While driving to the playground today the kids and I noticed several American flags, one of them was at half staff. I explained to the kids that the flag was only halfway up the pole in remembrance of the innocent people who were killed on Septermber 11th (today) and Eli responds, "Oh the flag is lower because there is less people in the world now?" Uh, yeah kid, kinda.

Joel and Eli just completed their first week of school. Eli's first week of Kindergarten and things seem to be going well. I was pleased with both of their teachers and hope the year continues with that sentiment.

It's A LOT quieter at home. Eli's gone. Nuff said.

Words from Eli and my Back

Eli tonight, "Mommy I always hug you really tight cause I love you so much!"

Eli a few days ago, "Mommy, does our house have a barcode at the bottom of it?"

A few days ago I hurt my lower back. Doing what I know not. I buckled walking in the upstairs hallway. At first I thought it was just going to be a quick pain and be gone. Not so much. It's been two or three days of me sitting and lying around and my kids wathching TV 24/7. Poor Kelly, it's one of his busiest weeks of work and he's having to do everything. We've had take out pizza three times this week. The thing that's bugging me is that the house doesn't seem to look any worse than when I'm up and going. What do I do all day anyway?

Feeling kinda sad lately too. Heard somebody at play group talking about a play date they'd scheduled with another family in the ward. They both have boys that are 8 and 5, so they're getting them together. Of course my boys are those ages and we don't get invited to those things. That same mom said to me about four year ago, "Well Joel doesn't play with other kids, does he?" I don't remember how I answered, but I wanted to say, "We'll it doesn't come naturally to him, but you can still include him!" Ugh.